以下来自于一本英文佛教书-------the "here & now" medittion
-------------------------------------
1, Wants or Needs?
When I want something that I can't have, or when I want others to do or not do something but my wishes are unmet, I suffer terribly because my mind keeps complaining about those "unfulfilled" wishes. Once, I was told to ask myself this: "Do I want it, or do I need it? If the answer is need, then ask further: "If you are without it, does it kill you? If it kills you to be without it, then it is need. If it doesn't kill you, it's want. So to liberate myself from suffering, I could very well not want it anymore!"
2, What is this lesson?
I believe that all events that take place in my life are lessons designed to help me evolve spiritually. therefore, each time I face a challenging or disappointing event, instead of allowing my mind to blame Heaven and Earth, I ask myself: What lesson can I learn from this situation?
I think all events happing in this world are "illusory and impermanent." It seems that most of these lessons are aiming at waking me up and for me to understand the essence of illusion and impermanence. They help me abandon attachments to things that I once held with such firm grip and believed to be so important to my life.
3,Judgment of good, bad, holy, evil
Learning to differentiate between good and bad, holy and evil, means for myself to avoid doing certain undesirable things. I am not to use such knowledge to hold judgment of bad and evil against others. As long as the ability to pass judgment on others exists, so will the ability to pass judgment on the self; both abilities are forms of bondage that lead to suffering.
4, Happiness and suffering
A disciple asked his master: " Why does everyone hurt me and make me suffer -- no one brings me happiness?"
The old master replied: " No one is capable of causing our suffering or bringing us happiness. We are the only ones who are capable of doing such things to ourselves."
The disciple frowned: " It's clear how badly that person treats me. How can that not be causing my suffering?"
The master slowly wrote in the sand: " It's not what happens to us but rather how we react to what happens. Maybe you should ask your mind again."
5, Changing other people
A woman asked her psychologist for ways to change her husband. The psychologist sadly replied: " I am sorry, Madam. I don't have this ability. Here I can only show people how to change themselves. Many women thought after they marry, they will gradually change their husbands. Many men believe similarly about their wives. I don't think I have ever seen anyone who is capable of truly changing another person."
6,Unconditional love
How does one love a man or a woman unconditionally? Loving unconditionally is loving someone totally, including both his/her bad and good aspects. In fact, you love him/her without needing the person to belong to you, regardless or whether the person loves you or another person, whether he/she is with you or without you. You are able to watch that person living his/her life, being him/herself without your needing to change anything in that person. The essence of Love does not hurt; what causes pain and suffering is our need: expecting, wishing and needing. Love does not restrain; only needs and power restrain, confine and hurt.
7, The bondage of another's opinion
A disciple asked his master: " Master, when someone has a wrong or bad opinion about me, I feel so hurt. What must I do?"
The master replied: " We are hurt because we wanted them to think something else, to have a different opinion. It is this want that causes our hurt -- not their opinion in itself. We should ask -- why did we want that? Why must we need that particular opinion? You should also understand three things: First, respect the freedom of opinion of others and of your own, keeping in mind that these two freedoms are not related to each other. Second, you must know that in forming an opinion, one bases on the criteria, background, standards and points of view of one's own. Thus, he couldn't have concluded otherwise. Third, there is no need to change his opinion. Nor there is need to defend yourself. "
